DC's Suicide Pact

The Squad is pretty much killing themselves (and their franchise) 
But there's still hope for Justice! ...Just maybe.
But probably not.

Today's bottom line: Suicide Squad is a SLOPPY movie. It's not outright bad, it just should have been SO much better, which in turn is way worse than receiving a standard "bad movie."

As a comic book fan; as a DC fan; as a Superman fan, my patience is wearing thin; BEYOND thin. 

  I'm going to address a few things here (and by a few I probably mean a lot) regarding my thoughts on Suicide Squad, DC's extended universe on film and the sickening shame it is to watch DC succumb to pressure from Marvel Studios and worse, to see the Marvel fans gang up on their competitors across the pond, essentially helping dig the deep, DEEP grave for DC that's been shoveled since 2013's Man of Steel debut, leaving us only a very faint glimpse of hope that this fine establishment of superhero storytelling can right its ship and give us the films the fans deserve.

  To start things off, I'm a DC fan first and foremost. I've always preferred the likings of Superman, Batman and The Justice League over any characters or stories to come from the universe of Spider-Man, the X-Men or The Avengers. That being said, I absolutely adore Marvel and as far as films go, there's no competition: Marvel's films are simply better.

  Marvel's films aren't just better; they're destroying any chance of DC keeping up; they're absolutely killing it on the big screen and they've been doing so since X-Men changed the world of comic book movies in the wake of the new millennium. With the exception of The Dark Knight trilogy, DC doesn't hold a candle to the movie mountain that Marvel has built over the last near-two decades.

  That being said, there's this weird notion going around of being able to like BOTH franchises (ya don't say?!); yes, TWO completely different franchises; WOW, no way! Yes kids, I promise, it's possible to cater to BOTH Marvel AND DC. Yes, I enjoy, cherish and own many films from both the Marvel and the DC franchises. When it comes down to choosing, sure I prefer DC, but I love and accept both, even though I can admit there's no competition; Marvel's films are better.

Can't argue that one.

  And maybe it's because I'm a "DC guy," that I was so heartbroken by Batman v Superman's critical and financial failures. I know it sounds asinine but I've seen the film about four times now, including a viewing of The Ultimate Cut containing 30 minutes of new footage, and it not only gets better with every viewing, but I actually truly, in my heart of hearts, believe it to be a more enjoyable film than many of the films in the glorified Marvel Cinematic Universe (AKA the MCU AKA the movies surrounding Iron Man, Captain America and The Avengers). CRAZY, right? Or perhaps many of the Marvelites have become so brainwashed; so ignorant, that they'll eat up complete sh*t as long as it's churned out by Marvel because, "Hey! It's Marvel! It's always gonna be good! and everything else sucks."

  I'm gonna get cynical for a moment here, yes mostly because I'm bitter about DC's backlash but when children are polluting message boards, calling Zack Snyder "Hack Snyder," saying he should kill himself, I feel the need to speak up on a couple clashing aspects that we're not addressing in this ridiculously violent, unnecessary feud that's been sparked between Marvel and DC fans which since BvS's failure, has gone from a small spark to a gigantic flame having endless gasoline dumped on it.

If I stay on fire long enough, maybe the movie will get better?

  I'll work my rant from the beginning and build it to the present day of comic book lore we're living in, starting in 2008 with the first Iron Man film.

  The same Summer that Iron Man shocked audiences with its refreshingly brilliant, light-hearted, heavily action-packed take on comic book movies, a little film also came out called The Dark Knight.

  Now, most people who know me, know that I sorta swear by Rotten Tomatoes, if only because it's a precisely calculated scorecard splitting critics vs audiences for nearly every film ever made. You can't really write off ALL of Rotten Tomatoes as "not getting it right," considering it's just calculating hundreds of reviews for each film between a 5-star rating and a 0-100% range. So when you really strip it down, it's a fairly precise calculation of critical reception on film between both critic and common moviegoer, even if one doesn't agree with a film's final score (case in point: Batman v Superman).

Still blows my mind.

  But let's not lose track here... Summer of 2008... Iron Man is released. The Dark Knight is released. Both films BLEW audiences away. For the record, I LOVE both films and consider them both near the very top of the entire comic book genre; both films are excellent. But let's talk about critical reception for a sec. Both of these films currently sit at a 94% on RT. Now, not to flog or praise either film, but to me, 94% is an inaccurate representation for these films to sit equally. The Dark Knight? That I get. It works not just as a comic book movie but as a ridiculously clever crime thriller for any average moviegoer. 94% makes sense. But Iron Man? While I consider it to be arguably the peak of the MCU (sorry to the fans who disagree), Iron Man is in enough of its own imperfect comic book bubble, that it truly deserves to be closer to an 85% at best (totally my opinion but hey, that's just me). That doesn't mean, in ANY way, that I'm saying anything negative about Stark's first outing. In fact, without that first success, the rest of the MCU wouldn't have much to rest on. The first Iron Man is not just brilliant, but it's one of the best Marvel movies ever made... It's just not in the same league as The Dark Knight.

  So what's my point, that I think Marvel movies are ranked too high on a dumb website? I mean... If you want to word it that way, that's NOT inaccurate. But the bigger picture here is that everyone, critics and fans alike, are blindly wanking Marvel movies just as equally as they blindly flog DC's.

  In 13 films, not ONE movie in the MCU has a rotten rating; even more baffling? They're almost ALL "certified fresh," or appraised enough to skate by as being considered "good enough" including (but not limited to) Iron Man 2, The Incredible Hulk, Thor: The Dark World and Avengers: Age of Ultron, yet Man of Steel sits at about a 53% rotten... Am I suggesting MOS should have a certified fresh rating? Absolutely not, but you can't make a logical argument for the lack of legitimate plot points in the aforementioned Marvel films and then rag on MOS for at least attempting an origin story.

  But at the end of the day, who cares what reception a movie gets? If you like the movie you like it; you hate it, you hate it. Right? Except comic book fans, like any diehard fans, have become unnaturally aggressive and belligerent towards fans "on the other side," and I'm not gonna be biased here. BOTH parties are guilty. It just so happens that DC is currently the one getting kicked in the balls repeatedly by the Marvel nazis on the other side of the fence. It's just amazing to me that the generic response to BvS was "Welp. Can't wait for Civil War to wash this bad taste out of my mouth." But you know what? Civil War was NOT groundbreaking in the SLIGHTEST. And no, that's not the ignorant DC fanboy in me talking. I loved the movie, for sure, but it's NOT what people are cracking it up to be.

This is where people are gonna get upset with me but haters be damned...

  The Marvel formula is getting old and TIRED and NO one can see it because they're too busy being blinded and ignorant by the monument Marvel has built. You all rant about how dreadful Eisenberg is as a neurotic Lex Luthor but you're gonna sit there and tell me that two full movies featuring Bucky Barnes as the cookie-cutout Winter Soldier, with zero character development, makes for a believable antagonist or anti-hero? Or that Zemo is a memorable villain at ALL? People slammed Eisenberg but at LEAST the guy tried to bring some range to the role. Everything outside the action sequences in Civil War is ENTIRELY forgettable. The most memorable part of the film? The airport fight... Which is FILLED with the usual eye-rolling "self aware" jokes. Every character just mouths off during all the big action scenes to keep things amusing and light hearted but then as a repercussion, nothing is taken seriously. There's no actual gravity or weight to ANYTHING that happens because Marvel doesn't take risks with their characters or story lines. Everything goes back to normal at the end of every film and the reset button is hit no matter how "bad" things get. So yes, after about three or four romps featuring Earth's Mightiest Heroes cracking the same kinds of jokes, it gets kinda old.

I can't be entirely ignorant. I'm truthfully not ragging on Marvel; I own all the above mentioned films in the MCU, if anything for completion since I'm a movie collector with a bad addiction, but I'll admit they're flawed. I absolutely enjoyed Civil War; it was immensely entertaining, but it felt like a hammed up, half-assed Avengers sequel leaving me to believe that Iron Man, Winter Soldier, Guardians of the Galaxy and the original Avengers are all legitimately BETTER movies. In my personal opinion, everything since the first Avengers flick, with the exception of Guardians, has become mind-numbingly formulaic and episodic (But as always, that's just me).

  Which in turn, is exactly WHY I give Batman v Superman ANY time of day. The film's flawed as all hell (I'll take any of the hate; some arguments against the film are VERY valid) but at least Snyder attempted to stay consistent in his vision to keep the film dark, diverse and visually aesthetic. It at least TRIES to be different but in the end, fans' reactions to that weren't even about the film itself rather than the reactionary comments like "Civil War was better; Civil War is the greatest comic book movie ever made." The whole thing is simply asinine to me.  

  Sure at the end of the day, maybe I'M the crazy one; Maybe these are all only opinions and no one's actually right or wrong and sure, NONE of this matters but this "feud" has grown so much bigger than a simple rumbling between two parties on opposite sides of the track. The critical reception from all parties has now, in only a few months time, influenced reshoots, script changes, alternate cuts and different versions of the final product of DC's films (not blaming Marvel at all but I'll be damned if competition isn't a b**ch to deal with). It's one thing that BvS earned an "Ultimate Version;" a much more fluent, superior cut which should have been released from the get-go but what's happened to Suicide Squad is just plain tragic; it's embarrassing and straight up abysmal.

"Oh, is he finally gonna get his point across?"

  So the story goes, director David Ayer had a vision for Suicide Squad; a dark, gritty depiction of anti-heroes; jokers who rebel with humor and rich history to drive their motivation. But after the critical and financial failures of BvS, Warner Bros. wanted to go with a different approach; a more comical, "light hearted" vision of the film to match a tone closer to that of the fun, zany wildly popular trailers that were released to market the film. The end result? An EXTREMELY sloppy, muddled cut that feels wildly mashed together and uneven.

*No spoilers ahead; just doses of harsh reality*

  Watching Suicide Squad is the equivalent of watching a piss-poor 'greatest hits' compilation; all your favorite moments meshed into one giant incoherent narrative that gives viewers no time to settle and enjoy the artwork; an absolutely cluttered mess, yet somehow feels stretched to a bladder-challenging climax of an all too familiar "been there, done that" feel to it.

  Suicide Squad isn't BAD, but it's beyond frustrating. While the first hour is the more interesting hour, diving into the very rushed but rich back stories of each character, the second hour becomes bland, predictable and hard to watch.

  It's an unnerving experience, as a fan, to watch an artist's vision with the knowledge that there's WAY more going on with the story and the characters than what you were given in the final product. Forget about chunks of the movie apparently going missing and the devastation of re-shoots and re-cuts. One of the worst aspects to Squad is that EVERY great part of every one of its trailers; every worthwhile moment is completely rushed, crammed, gone with a second and not savored the way audiences expect or deserve.

  Biggest offense under this category? Jared Leto's Joker.

Are we really surprised?

  Holy HELL, I know people weren't happy with Leto's take from the trailers but what the final cut does to him is just simply not fair. Forget your opinions on this new version of the clown prince of crime (no matter how much he may look like one of ICP's Juggalos); forget the fact that he's not one of the main characters (he was never supposed to be, from the start) but EVERY scene of Leto is nothing but a small snippet of the character; Joker's one-liners or tiny bits of him cackling or shooting a tommy gun; there's no room for the guy to BREATHE. And just when Leto's Joker DOES start to settle with me, his scenes are over in an instant or the camera cuts to another character or event. There's no room to let him linger in the twisted-ness of such an iconic role. And the worst part of the use of his Joker at all is that almost every single bit of him teased in the trailers is crammed together in one rushed flashback sequence in the beginning of the film making it feel like the film's narrative served NO purpose for him to begin with. Instead of alluding to him as a massive presence, or using him as a surprise, we see most of his scenes right from the get-go in a rundown on Quinn's backstory within the first 10 minutes of the film, and then the few scenes he's in after that are nothing more than a mere afterthought.

  And THAT's the film's biggest problem; it doesn't have the first clue as to what to do with the narrative. The characters are shockingly way more interesting than you'd expect but in the end, the only Squad members who get any shred of character development are Margot Robbie's Harley Quinn and Will Smith's Deadshot. Granted, Jai Courtney's Capt. Boomerang and Killer Croc steal the show from time to time, Harley and Deadshot are the only main characters who are truly interesting, so it's no surprise that Smith and Robbie are two of the biggest acting highlights of the whole damn thing.

And the fact that Robbie is a total badass and insanely hot doesn't hurt either

  Robbie's actually really good in this flick; we all knew it from the previews. She totally embodies the character and plays "crazy" REALLY well. But she can't keep the entire squad from sinking all by herself. And ironically, Smith doesn't hog the spotlight like he's done in so many movies before. Both of them are the legitimate saving graces here.

  But the movie is still a sh*t-show to say the least. There are incredibly worthwhile moments here that simply don't shine because they're insanely rushed and snipped together in a muddled, inconsistent manner. The editors of this film should ALL be fired. It literally felt like there were six different editors snipping together this movie to make it feel colorful, "edgy" and fun but then five editors got bored and went home and left the piece-of-crap third act to someone who probably worked on 2011's Green Lantern (wouldn't put it past them; the loud, obnoxiously poor CGI isn't the only comparison). The tone is wildly inconsistent until the film's last half hour which is ironically as terrible as it is predictable.

Still not as terrible as Green Lantern (WHY CAN'T THESE MOVIES JUST BE GOOD?)

  And I can't help but feel like there was a major lack of communication when it came to that tone. The trailers all alluded to this glitzy, glamorous, edgy R-rated romp of badass vigilantes who spatter the screen with colorful dialogue and hyper-violent tendencies, yet the final result feels like a VERY watered down, way-too-contained PG-13 cliché comic book movie we've all seen A HUNDRED TIMES. It's literally like the filmmakers backed themselves into a corner and were like "WELP. We're too far into this. Can't change it, mutate it and abort it anymore than we already have. MIGHT as well throw in some popular songs that everyone knows."

  I'll break here for a moment to question (one of) the studio's (many puzzling) decisions for a moment... Big budget comic book movies such as these usually cost roughly $200 mill. to pump out. That being said, it doesn't just cost money to get the rights to play someone else's music in a film... It costs a LOT of money. ESPECIALLY with music that's as well known and as popular as the music Squad uses for its incredible soundtrack choices. Not using "incredible" lightly here, the movie features some of the most well known tunes in the world including (but not limited to) Sympathy for the Devil, House of the Rising Sun, Seven Nation Army, Without Me, Fortunate Son and Bohemian Rhapsody... And that's literally just naming a few of them. I've never heard such a wildly extensive soundtrack featuring some of life's more memorable radio hits. The problem with using these? It's a complete crutch. The film clearly didn't have enough going for it so they depended on popular music to try and boost the personality that the film was already lacking. Not even that, songs will often play for no more than 30 seconds at a time, mostly to introduce a character or set up a "badass" scene (these moments happen most at the beginning of the film; the more "fun" but choppy hour) and then the song is never heard again. It's almost like, through the music, you can hear David Ayer rushing to get the next song-clip ready for the next scene. Every piece of music is completely shoehorned and it shows.

  And yet this ALL comes back to the film's attitude in wanting to be a flashy-showy picture of crazy edginess and boundary pushing elements. This is a problem due to the fact that the film isn't NEARLY as badass as it thinks it is. This movie should have been an event; a staple for the DC franchise taking the proper steps forward in success, not backwards. It's horrible because there's a REALLY good movie buried in here somewhere, but the final product is a suffocating experience at times only teasing glimpses of what this franchise is capable of. Most of the potential is bottled up leaving the viewer only wanting more. The film is all over the place and the few saving graces can't save it overall, making this one of the more frustrating experiences as a moviegoer and a DC fan.

And sometimes it's REALLY hard being a DC fan.

  That's what it all comes down to. It's simply hard to be a DC fan after this weekend. The backlash from Batman v Superman still burns since its March release, and while its Ultimate Cut goes on tragically unnoticed, this week Suicide Squad literally threatens the DC extended universe with a suicide mission of its own. Because if WB continues to let the negative influence shape the way these movies are made; if they constantly feel the need to "lighten" the film's mood, up the tone, create re-shoots and re-edits just to keep up with Marvel's success, DC films are simply never going to succeed. From the newly rebooted DC extended universe, this is 3 out of 3 films now that are not only certifiably "rotten" but getting absolutely slammed by all ends from butt-hurt comic book fans, from all walks of life; each film getting more backlash than the last, which is SHOCKING considering the fact that after Batman v Superman, it didn't seem like things could get much worse for DC... Alas, we were wrong... So very wrong.

This is live.

  So where does that leave us, in this dark, hopeless unforgivable black hole where there appears to be no light at the end of the tunnel? 

I have one answer: Justice League.

  Now HEAR ME OUT. I'm not suggesting that DC should pull out the JLA as a last resort in resurrecting any shot at success for this hopelessly miserable franchise. Instead, I truly feel that within time, Justice League legitimately has a chance of righting the ship all on its own, mostly because all these films, good or bad, are laying out the pieces for a bigger, much more glamorous franchise than the one that appears to be building (and failing) before our very eyes.

  We have the building blocks. We'll have a Wonder Woman movie before the new Justice League film and a new Batfleck movie is already in the works and those two things alone are worth keeping on the radar. Case in point? They were two of some of the absolute best things about Batman v Superman. Sure Gal Gadot proved Wonder Woman can appear as not only hot, but truly believable and not corny. The reason we've never had a modern day Wonder Woman approach in this age of cinema is because the character in her incarnation has been unbelievably campy and utterly ABSURD. So for WB to finally seemingly nail the character is an enormous accomplishment on their part, considering WW is one of the major players in the JLA (crossing my fingers they don't f**k it up. REALLY hard to be hopeful these days). But the real reason to get hyped? 

BATFLECK.

Creeping over shoulders since he was Hunting Good Will

  I won't rave about his take on the Caped Crusader but if there's one thing most people CAN agree on regarding BvS, it's that Ben Affleck is arguably the best part of the whole damned movie. With one movie alone, Affleck proved to be arguably the BEST version of Batman and Bruce Wayne we'll ever see in our lifetime, and no, that is not an over-exaggeration. He gives the Dark Knight a sense of terror that in three movies, Christian Bale never even comes close to. Sure, Bale played a great part and a very believable hero but compared to Affleck, he's just NOT Batman. It's actually quite weird to look back at how un-Batman-like Bale is after watching how on point Affleck eats up the character the way he eats protein, or small children, or women, to get in shape for the massive role (all puns intended), but alas, I said I wouldn't rave. The main reason to look up to his character is that he plays a completely believable leader; a very strange aspect considering Superman is normally the face of the Justice League. Now, anyone who saw BvS knows that Batman's gonna have to be the face of the gang for now but honestly, even after seeing just a small Comic-Con teaser trailer, Affleck truly appears to be a legitimately good choice for the temporary captain of the League, being bested in the "intimidating tough guy" category only by none other than Aquaman.

BAD. ASS.

  Aquaman's one I won't touch up on, mostly because I only caught mere glimpses of what the character will bring to the story but holy sh*t, does Jason Momoa appear like he's gonna deliver BIG time. I'm trying not to get too excited but turning the most laughable comic book hero into a Game of Thrones-veteran; a medieval BADASS is the most genius thing you could have done to his character. Again, that Justice League teaser alone got me giddy like a little schoolgirl.

  What can I say folks? In the end, I'm a DC guy. It's been a hard year for folks like us. Hell, it's been a hard three years. But I'll be the first to admit, these films are flawed as hell. So yes, I am hopeful for this upcoming season's Doctor Strange because I can at least almost guarantee that Marvel will deliver...once again.

Also, it's Benedict Cumberbatch. HOW CAN IT NOT BE GOOD?

  I understand I sounded bitter back there  when talking about my feelings on Marvel but I'll admit when I'm being stubborn and that's all this is; irrelevant stubbornness. I'm waving my white flag. I surrender. No more slander. But if you think I'm under a facade and that all this fandom will go away, you're horribly mistaken. I will still defend Man of Steel and I will STILL find reasons to watch Batman v Superman (HATERS BE DAMNED), but that said, I can also admit that Suicide Squad KINDA sucks... Or at the very least, isn't NEARLY close to the film we fans should have received. 
  Bottom line: we deserve better. You deserve better. These stories have been around for what, 80 years? We're living in a literal GOLDEN age of comic book movies. We finally have filmmakers and audiences who want to do the source material justice; literally use the budget, screenwriters, actors and directors who want to "get it right." We're witnessing a comic book nerd empire being built before our very eyes and it's more powerful than ever. 

A truly terrifying thought

  Comic book movies are better than they've ever been; they have become an insanely popular unstoppable force, taking over the film industry and its DC's turn to get a shot at the glory. I have an unbelievable amount of much faith in the potential that these films have and if all parties involved truly TRIED to do them justice (pun intended?) and didn't succumb to pressure from studios and the competitors' much, MUCH better movies, these films have a legitimate chance at being not only as good but better than some of the films of Marvel's empire. We as a society CAN love both sides; I know we can; we can have the best of both worlds; THE POTENTIAL IS OUT THERE, but we need to get along dammit, and we need to right this ship...And maybe it's just the optimist in me; maybe it's the diehard Superman fan I've been since I was a kid; maybe it's the tragically hopeful DC fan that I am, but I truly believe it can only get better from here... It HAS to get better, right?

RIGHT???

Forget it... I don't care anymore. Just give us more Deadpool.